Al Qaeda admits 'Wonder Years' is cool

CNN.com Headlines for July 30, 2007:

Infamous heckler Cheney rips on hostages with Oprah

FDA posts pics of Obama wedding pregnant MySpace members

Bush to Clinton: crush Obama, freak out

Obama admits sexy stripper is hot

Obama backs over Oprah in Toyota: "Hillary did it"

Repubicans back killing Brangelina in 2008

Pedophile posts pics of Tom Snyder. Vick to FDA: "Don't yank pics!"

Al Qaeda admits 'Wonder Years' is cool

Oprah to Taliban: 'Don't freak out about dead Tom Snyder in the Toyota. Oprah did it. Surprise.'

O.J. Simpson's slain wife's letter to police: "I did it". O.J. educates others on wife's guilt.

Clinton surprised to find ice in tap water: 'Oh, my God... We need help'

CNN.com Headlines for July 27, 2007:

Clinton surprised to find ice in tap water: 'Oh, my God... We need help'

Obama surprised to find himself wedged in Clinton cleavage

Warlords pelt Obama with beef chunks at party


Whoopi Goldberg covered in blood -- oh no!

Report: Lynching overused in London's top hotel

5 of the largest and most useless Whoopi Goldberg surgeries

Revelations of cool Iraqi tea parties rock Earth

Nicole Ritchie sentenced to get slapped with dead kitty for 90 hours

Tea parties may increase psychosis risk

Congress to give boys marijuana before recess

God halts Muslim prayer time: "You boys need help"

Clinton calls China 'Earth of the West.' Obama to Hillary: 'Do you really know what the Earth is?' Obama stands by calling Clinton ugly bear molestor

CNN.com headlines for July 26, 2007:

Military producing ugly baby faces

White House makes mockery of Lohan's ugly fat friends

Fat friends sink in swimming pool

Dogfighting dog dies from dogged determination

How to prevent a bear from cheating in dogfighting

9/11 hero scolded by White House as fat and ugly

Obama stands by calling Clinton ugly bear molestor

Do you really know how to make a mockery of disabled kids?

Dem senators want Gonzales to quit swimming in White House pool

Raging Obama heads to White House to make Gonzales drink wastewater

Death is Lohan's best legal move

Cat dies from dogfighting after mix-up

Lohan gets hammered, safeguards Earth from peril

Clinton calls China 'Earth of the West'

Obama to Hillary: Do you really know what the Earth is?

White House fears drunk McCain may return to Earth to make mockery of astronauts

Clinton fears tea parties, heads to Wild West

McCain getting hammered 'like a drunk baby in a ravine'

Obama to get head from dog: 'This may be silly'

Explosions in Alaska reveals Barack Obama's contempt for ice

CNN.com Headlines for July 25, 2007

Taliban claims to wax Beyonce's face

Obama comment latest stain on Taliban image

3-2-1-BLAM! Obama mulls brutal Britney Spears murder

Obama questioned after "giant fish invasion" comment

9-year-old's DUI latest stain on image of kids

Giant Obama shrinking, loses 580 pounds

Bush: I'll take Iraq War over sightseeing with wife

Clinton blasts Obama apart into flaming debris in explosions showdown

Explosions in Alaska reveals Barack Obama's contempt for ice

Clinton blasts Obama apart to help bank teller find boots

Bush boots wife, dates wax Lindsay Lohan

Cool terrorist to crash in Barack Obama's mansion for summer

Clinton blasts soccer: 'May pressure kids to shoot up'

Barack Obama's latest image problem: burning the number 666 into hand

Irresponsible terrorist blasts apart innocent victim's body

Body of shark attack victim found riddled with bullets

Incredible sex predators riddled with bullets, make mockery of death

Baby death makes mockery of murderous rampage

Many in U.S. call Gonzales scandal 'hot ghetto mess'

CNN.com Headlines from July 24, 2007

Floods leave 350,000 without sex hotline

Bush comments on Harry Potter pages 371-402: 'Fix problems'

Many in U.S. call Gonzales scandal 'hot ghetto mess'

Bionic Ashcroft snowman to pose for Playboy

Bush pressuring bionic lesbians to stay out of home

President Bush ordered daughters to pose for Playboy

President Bush ordered wife to fix body with eating disorders

Pakistani militants say they seek people who 'rape dinosaurs'

Home invasion key to ghetto tea parties

Sex offender shows off hot wife's back

Top 10 golfers to never murder a war vet

What if hurricanes stop hot ghetto parties?

McCain tried to hide in closet again

Sex offender keeping religious small town safe

McCain trying to reach Harry Potter fans with hand jobs

What if 100mph glaciers attacked this summer?

Girls of Al Qaeda to pose for Playboy

Lindsay Lohan apologizes to ancestors for birth

Cnndotcom scoop leaked to CNN.com

Before we could post our latest news story, CNN.com ran the story first: Snowman, lesbians, bubbas steal debate

Russia story first reported on Cnndotcom confirmed by Washington Post

Transcript from News Hour with Jim Lehrer from July 19, 2007

RAY SUAREZ: For more on the unfolding diplomatic conflict, we're joined by Mary Jordan, correspondent for the Washington Post in London.
And, Mary, when did this all get started?

MARY JORDAN, Washington Post Correspondent: Well, it all started, most amazingly, with a tea cup

cnndotcom scoop

McCain trying to get buzz on

CNN.com Headlines for January 23, 2007

Will it be animal lovers against spacewalkers in daily White House Barry Bonds debate?

Michael Vick, Barry Bonds protest Taliban lovers

5-lb bag of chips cost hip-hop stars millions

Doctors fear Bush's addiction to hot teen sex

Taliban takes blame for lightning

Animal lovers target cancer with car bombs

Bush steals bag of chips from police

Top fear worrying Democratic voters: Dinosaurs

Doctors find 'glaciers of trash' in Bush's colon

McCain releases 400 falcons in to Georgia's top court

Thieving seagull dies trying to stop Iraq war

McCain trying to get buzz on

How to stop worrying about religious husband killing for money

Animal lovers kill 35 falcons in protest of Michael Vick mess

Romney dies trying to take on 5-lb Chihuahua (Martians mourn for beloved leader)

Doctors stop worrying about fitting probe in to Bush's colon

Romney forces Michael Vick to kill girlfriend's baby after toddler steals chips

Osama to show true colors in peace protest

How to stop worrying about magic falcons

McCain clarifies: 'I ain't no Vinny Gorgeous. Vinny Gorgeous ain't rich and famous. Vinny Gorgeous ain't tough. McCain plays with sex appeal.'

CNN.com Headlines for July 19, 2007

Taliban stops space vacations

Teen drug problem entertains U.S. troops

White House: 'Tony Snow must quit barbaric bad boy ways'

Newborn rescued from trash bin: 'I ain't no baby'

Cheney to Iraq: 'King me!"

White House accused of betting on checkers

Cheny to blow Tony Snow on YouTube

Idyllic teen-sex lies beneath Iraq insurgency

Study: Dinosaurs overuse their hairspray

Pentagon scolds newborn: 'Quit plan to become president'

McCain clarifies: 'I ain't no Vinny Gorgeous. Vinny Gorgeous ain't rich and famous. Vinny Gorgeous ain't tough. McCain plays with sex appeal.'

Bush: If we nuke God, how do we fight Harry Potter?

CNN.com Headlines for July 19, 2007

Obama eats nearly $1000 of asbestos in 20-hour standoff with Rowling

Dying Tammy Faye Messner: I caught botulism for Obama

Dying Iraqi's last words: 'Sopranos' ends in murder

John Edwards touches child, psychs out McCain

Restless McCain battling 14,000 chimps in 'dead zone'

Restless legs syndrome reported in the West. What you can do to beat the chaos: Say a prayer

God kicks out son to 'help preserve secrecy'

McCain dies after battling Price is Right host in first round of Mexico's 'Murder Open"

Scores killed in British diplomat's Easy-Bake Oven

McCain straddles John Edwards, hospitalized for restless legs syndrome

McCain, Edwards offer tips for beating kids, battling evolution

Merv Griffin's last words, "Do what you can to kill Steve Jobs, for Apple's top powergeek chokes the American chimps"

John Edwards suspended at camp for suitcase chaos

McCain hospitalized for 'Fickle Warlord Syndrome’

Bush talks about midnight dream: “Trying to be a man, I fake fight Harry Potter on plane, arrest God in Brazil for theft of $1000”

Cozy up to the Mumbai building collapse and lose your legs

Bush: If we nuke God, how do we fight Harry Potter?

Naked Steve Jobs gets pleasures, smiles

Naked candidates won't leave New Hampshire building

'Pecs, legs' McCain's guilty pleasures

McCain, Edwards top candidates for first naked American in space